A little advice on living

Sue and I were discussing the news about Ted Kennedy and his health situation. It reflects right back to my own. As we talked about it, she told me something I never knew before. The day of my brain tumor surgery back on March 22, 2006, she asked the surgeon how much time I might have left? He told her I might only have about six months. She was devastated, but kept this to her self until yesterday. I'm glad I never knew.

I decided at that time though to live my life and enjoy all of the time I could with my family. Two years plus later, I'm enjoying myself more than I ever did. I laugh and play more, and don't find myself worrying about tomorrow as much as I used to. 

While going through some old files on my computer, I found a file which sums up what I want to say better than I could do it myself. I don't remember where I got this, but if you should take anything away from reading this, a change in your view of life would be a pretty good start. So here it is. Enjoy.

+++++++++++++++++++++

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, or when we retire. The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now.

If not now, when?
Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. Happiness is the way, so, treasure every moment that You have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, enough to spend your time with...and remember that time waits for no one.

So, stop waiting
--until your car or home is paid off
--until you get a new car or home
--until your kids leave the house
--until you go back to school
--until you lose ten pounds
--until you gain ten pounds
--until you finish school
--until you get a divorce
--until you get married
--until you have kids
--until you retire
--until summer
--until spring
--until winter
--until fall
--until you die

There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So-work like you don't need money, Love like you've never been hurt, And dance like no one's watching. They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.
Take the time to live !!! 

Pictures of the past

I have had some old slides my mom had saved for quite a while. I told her I would look them over and give them back to her. Well, I had them way longer than I should have, and all the while they sat in their container while I did other things.

I finally decided to do something with them, so I fired up the scanner and gave them each a scan. I hadn't tried to scan slides before, but I'm glad I finally did. I'm a lot more encouraged to move on and do the slides of my own that have been sitting around for years waiting for me to do something with them too.

The slides my mom had dated from 1960, to about 1973 or so. It was quite a treat to see them. I had forgotten what a geek I was. Nevertheless, I scanned them all and will build a CD for each of my boys to take with them into the future. Hopefully when they have kids, they can take a few minutes to enjoy them too. 

The following picture is an example of what I discovered. I'm at the top, with my brother and sister beneath me. I would guess I'm about 12 or 13 years old or so. I shouldn't have waited so long to do this. So much water has passed under the bridge since then... and we were all cuter back then too.

I am my brother's keeper

I have taken a turn in my life that was both sudden and unexpected. I guess in the back of my mind I had a feeling that it would eventually come to pass.

As I've already stated in the past, my younger brother was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) which is complicated by frontal lobe dementia. His steady downgrading has become more apparent and I can really begin to see him losing the part that was my little brother.

He has not been able to eat normally, and subsequently has lost a lot of weight. A week ago he got an overdue addition of a feeding tube placed in him so he could take in nourishment. However, that has not gone well. He lives alone and it seems does not have what it takes to look after himself anymore.

A week ago I didn’t know anything about becoming a guardian for another person, but by mid week it was clear that this was exactly what I needed to do. Friday, I spent the majority of the day applying to be a guardian and conservator for my brother. I'm finding out that it’s a very involved process, and requires a number of court appearances to make it permanent. By order of the court, I also had to find an attorney to represent my brother. The whole process is involved and from the look of it, expensive.

For someone trying to do the right thing, and asking nothing in return, it is a stressful and thankless process. I do not know how other people do it.

Let’s see how it goes.

Update: In the end, I decided that this was not the thing to do. I withdrew all petitions placed before the court, before the first hearing date. By taking over my brother's decision making, I basically rob him of his individual civil rights. I will help him as much as I can, but I will not take his basic liberties away from him. As much as I can help it, he will retain these until the day he no longer is able. I love him too much to do anything else.