Moving on...

I've removed some of my recent posts relating to the political scene. Specifically, stuff relating to Bush, and the Republican and Democratic parties. It's all old news now and no one wants to read about it anyway. I suppose all this will crop up in another three or four years, but for now I'm done with it and have moved on. 

Santa... a criminal?

WASHINGTON, D.C. - When Santa Claus comes to town this week, he’d better watch out — because the federal government may be making a list of his crimes (and checking it twice), the Libertarian Party warned today.

“Hark the federal agents sing, Santa is guilty of nearly everything,” said Libertarian Party press secretary George Getz. “The feds know when Santa’s been bad or good — and he’s been bad, for goodness sakes.”

Does Santa belong in the slammer? Instead of stuffing stockings, should he be making license plates?

Yes, said Getz, if he’s held to the same standards as a typical American. For example:

* Every December 25, the illegal immigrant known as Santa Claus crosses the border into the United States without a passport. He carries concealed contraband, which he sneaks into the country in order to avoid inspection by the U.S. Customs Service. And just what’s in all those brightly colored packages tied up with ribbons, anyway? The Drug Czar and Homeland Security want to know.

* Look at how this international fugitive gets around: Santa flies in a custom-built sleigh that hasn’t been approved by the FAA. He never files a flight plan. He has no pilot’s license. In the dark of night, he rides the skies with just a tiny bioluminescent red light to guide him — a clear violation of traffic safety regulations.

* Pulling Santa’s sleigh: Eight tiny reindeer, a federally protected species being put to hard labor. None of these reindeer have their required shots, and Santa’s never bothered to get these genetically- engineered animals registered and licensed. It’s no wonder: He keeps them penned outside his workplace in a clear violation of zoning laws.

* But Crooked Claus the Conniving Capitalist harms more than just animals — he’s hurting hard-working American laborers, too. Isn’t Santa’s Workshop really Santa’s Sweatshop, where his non-union employees don’t make minimum wage and get no holiday pay? Add the fact that OSHA has never inspected the place, and you have a Third-World elf-exploitation operation that only Kathy Lee Gifford could love.

* No wonder Santa is able to maintain his monopoly over the toy distribution industry: He’s cornered the Christmas gift market. Santa dares to give away his products for free in a sinister attempt to crush all competition — just like Microsoft’s Internet Explorer. Antitrust Lawsuit Memo to the feds: Is Santa Claus the Bill Gates of Christmas?

The bottom line, said Getz: “It might be tough sledding for Jolly St. Nick this Christmas if the government decides to prosecute him.

“We’re just surprised it hasn’t already happened. After all, Santa Claus is everything that politicians aren’t: He’s popular, reliable, and gives us something for nothing every December 25th — instead of taking our money every April 15th,” says Getz.

Another Milestone Bites The Dust

I had my final MRI for the year today, and as all of the prior MRIs this year, it was clear, with no change. This makes the whole year free of any signs of my old enemy. The year has been without any drugs, chemo, etc., so I feel pretty fantastic right about now. 

My physical training is showing signs of getting me back to my old form and then some. A couple of years ago, while I was on chemo, I doubt that I could have done 5 push-ups. Last night, at the start of my training session, I did 70, and I could have done more. I still have some poundage to get off, but I'm feeling now that it's a goal that I can make happen. 

What have we become?

I receive a weekly email from the Digital Journal. In it are various articles, etc. which are good sometimes and not so interesting at others. 

One just published An Open Letter To The Long Island Black Friday Wal-Mart Shoppers, was well written and has you looking inside yourself and asking "What have we become?"

I don't know, but it's disturbing.

My little brother

I'm almost getting to the point of not even reading the news anymore. There is nothing in it that gives us any hope for the future. We have become a society hyper-focused on the negative. The media forces this onto us with every broadcast. We can't turn left or right without being told what a dire situation the world is in. They don't give us hope, just futility. It's inescapable, sad, and disturbing, and I'd rather not play a part in it anymore. Our own personal situations have slid into insignificance, or so they would have us believe. 

This is wrong. We each play an important part, and the stories of our lives are intertwined and important... not just the people close to us, but to the people we have known and made a part of our own world.

I've spoken previously about my brother, Tracy, and so I wanted to talk a little more about the most recent events. His battle with ALS and dementia has reached a point where we finally had to act for him. You look at your siblings and know that they will always be there. That the person that you laughed and played with, would always be at your side. It's a cruel and horrible fate to watch them slip away before your eyes... slowly and helplessly.

I wanted to let you know the latest happenings here. It's important to me to pass this on, both for him, and for me.

We placed Tracy in an assisted care group home on Saturday. We got him a small apartment, to take the place of the house he had lost. We thought with his mobility, and his perceived state of mind this would be a good temporary step. We were wrong. Between last Thursday and Friday, he had wandered off and gotten lost 3 times. He was found on those occasions by the police, fire department, and even (gracious) strangers, who could see that he was not doing well. It became painfully obvious that he had reached a point where he was becoming his own safety issue. It hurt so much to do this. He had become a stranger, and not the brother I knew that was so full of life. We had to do something for him, and do it fast. A group assisted care home was the best solution for him for now, and my mother and Tracy's daughter found him a good one.

I've spent almost every day during the past week getting his house cleaned out. In his life-long job as a diesel mechanic, he had accumulated a LOT of things related to his job. With help from the the family, we have done a good job of emptying out his place. I have no way of sufficiently thanking them for sacrificing them for their time. They gave it willingly, and I deeply appreciate their efforts.

It's a good thing I am in good physical shape. Otherwise I would never be able to move all his stuff. At this point, I still have a couple days worth of effort to clean out his house, but at least that part will be done, and I can go about the task of selling it all off to help pay for his care. It's a ponderous job that I am not looking forward to. I have had to put my own life on hold to do this, but in fact, there is absolutely no one else that can. Somehow, I've dug deep down and found strength I never knew I had. I'm convinced now that this is within all of us. I just found my own for the first time.

Tracy seems to be happy in his new place, but it's so hard to see him like this. My heart aches every time I look into his eyes. I've never felt so helpless.
Now, I'm just trying to help his daughter sort things out and do my best to make sure he has the finances, etc. to live out the rest of his days with some dignity and grace.

Everyone in the family seems to be holding it together, mostly because they have to. My mom has done a remarkable job watching after his welfare and finances, despite her own health situations. She still is watching over her son like any mother would.

Tracy's oldest daughter, Samantha, is faced with the task of watching her dad slip away before her eyes, and have to make decisions no one should have to make at her age. Her own individual life is just taking shape, and she must set some part of that aside to do the things her dad needs of her. She is holding up well, and so I just try to support her, and offer my council as she finds need for it.

I thought about forming a non-profit organization to take the sales from his stuff and make them tax deductible for anyone buying them. This might make them more appealing for purchase, while financing his care. What I found out though, was that getting this sort of thing started was not a job for one person. It takes a team of knowledgeable people and up-front funds to make this happen. This is beyond the scope of my abilities, so I will just do the best I can with the resources I have, and hope it is good enough. 

It has to be.

Robot Wars

There was a program that originated in the UK called Robot Wars. It was the closest thing to reality TV that I have ever watched. It was great for geeks, engineers, mechanics, and anyone who ever wanted to build something and do battle with another. Here's a clip showing a typical night in the arena.

This is one show I'd like to see return to TV. The technology has changed, along with the interest and knowledge to use it. I think there would be a whole batch of new ideas, and a larger number of young people ready to take their enthusiasm from the video screen to real life.

What do you say BBC? Give it some serious thought. There's a whole new crowd of guys just waiting to do battle. Let get to it.

The perfect end to my 2008 Summer

It may not seem like it sometimes, but 2008 has been a great year for me. Of course there have been a few ups and downs, but then who doesn't have those. What I'm most happy with is that I just had my latest MRI, which has been pushed to quarterly. As with all my past MRIs (since the surgery), it is clear of any signs of a reoccurrence. In fact, it looks identical to my other past ones. If it didn't have a date on it, I wouldn't be able to tell the difference. After two and a half years, and with more than a year off any drugs or treatment, I couldn't be happier. I have one more MRI before years end, but we have already discussed pushing them out even further, as our confidence grows. I'm not ready to say it's gone, but it's beginning to have that appearance. Wahoo!

A little word fun with Wordle

A friend of mine send me this link, so I thought it was worthy enough to pass on. Go to Wired Blog site example page first to see what examples have been done from our political leaders, then go to the Wordle site to see other examples, and try it out for yourself. I think you'll find it pretty interesting. Enjoy.

Will it Float?... The real world.

About six weeks ago, I wanted to try Ethos. It's a compound and gas additive that is marketed to increase gas mileage, performance, and decrease emissions. It sounded great, and anything that would make our cars work better is OK with me. However, not being one to get all caught up in the hype, I wanted to try a little out first in a real world test using our own vehicles, before I allowed myself to be swept up in the excitement. If it worked for me in our own cars, I would be sold on its enhancing qualities. 

I am now reporting that in at least one aspect (the most important one in my book), mileage. Ethos does not live up to the hype. I'll give you my results in a minute. 

As far as a performance enhancer, I think this depends on many variables: the driver, the make of car, the engine, blah, blah, blah. Where some might feel a little increase in performance, another might not. The only way to really measure this, is to put the car on a dynamometer and measure it properly. Of course I don't have one in my garage, so it was just done by subjective feel and impression. Personally, I couldn't tell that much difference, but Sue said she could feel something. Your mileage may vary on this.

As far as reduced emissions, this is another item relegated to equipment designed to do so. I have no clue whether it made any difference, but I may save some of what I have left of the Ethos I bought to validate this when it comes time to reregister our cars.

Now for the big one, mileage. I'm disappointed to say that it made no impact. In fact, my own empirical data shows that it did just the opposite. Our driving is painfully predictable, so the driving conditions were nearly exactly the same from the start to the finish of our home test. We also tried different gases... economy gas (Costco), good gas (Chevron). This had no impact.

We drive a Mazda 3. The first tank without Ethos gave us 29.66 mpg. I never have checked the mileage on the Mazda, so I was pretty impressed, and looking forward to an increase. The second and third tank full with Ethos gave us 24.44 and 26.17 mpg respectively. As you can see, the mileage actually went down, and never approached the mileage without Ethos.

We also drive a PT Cruiser. The first tank without Ethos, yielded 22.27 mpg. about what I expected, maybe a little better. I ran three more tank fulls with Ethos. The first one gave me 23.31 mpg. Although it was a slight improvement, it was still within what I would consider the margin of error for combined highway and city driving. Not impressive enough to support the claims. My next two tank fulls yielded 20.79 and 20.28 mpg respectively. Certainly less that I got without Ethos, when I expected better. As you can see, it leveled off, giving a couple miles less per gallon than without it.

Conclusion: I don't consider Ethos the miracle additive that it's claims have made, and will not be using it in the future. I used about 2.0oz for each tank full, and at the price I paid plus shipping, this comes to roughly 3.75 a tank full, which is roughly equal to another gallon of gas. I should expect Ethos to extend my mileage by at least the mileage I was getting, not cut it short, making my tank of gas more expensive for the same or less mpg. So in essence, I'm not going to advocate using Ethos as a mileage enhancer. I'm sorry to those who have gotten better results, and feel it is the best thing since sliced bread. I didn't find it to be so.

Will it float?

I am as concerned about my gas mileage as anyone. I try to do all the right things to my car to make it run as good as it can, but in the end, to quote our fearless leader, G.W. Bush... "It is what it is".

A friend of mine has had some involvement with with a product called Ethos. You can check out the product yourself by clicking on the Ethos link and read about it. It supposedly can increase your mileage and give your car increased performance, but is environmentally safe. The reports available on the site seem encouraging enough, so it's worth a few bucks to give it a spin and see if it's all that it's cracked up to be.

I bought a sample bottle to run a test of my own (there's nothing like a home test to filter out the truth in advertising). I haven't used any yet. I'm still figuring the mileage on our two vehicles, before using it in them.

I suppose it will be a few weeks before I have anything difinitive, but I'm anxious and hopeful that it will give me the same sort of increases is advertises. Stay tuned for further developments.

A little advice on living

Sue and I were discussing the news about Ted Kennedy and his health situation. It reflects right back to my own. As we talked about it, she told me something I never knew before. The day of my brain tumor surgery back on March 22, 2006, she asked the surgeon how much time I might have left? He told her I might only have about six months. She was devastated, but kept this to her self until yesterday. I'm glad I never knew.

I decided at that time though to live my life and enjoy all of the time I could with my family. Two years plus later, I'm enjoying myself more than I ever did. I laugh and play more, and don't find myself worrying about tomorrow as much as I used to. 

While going through some old files on my computer, I found a file which sums up what I want to say better than I could do it myself. I don't remember where I got this, but if you should take anything away from reading this, a change in your view of life would be a pretty good start. So here it is. Enjoy.

+++++++++++++++++++++

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, or when we retire. The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now.

If not now, when?
Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. Happiness is the way, so, treasure every moment that You have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, enough to spend your time with...and remember that time waits for no one.

So, stop waiting
--until your car or home is paid off
--until you get a new car or home
--until your kids leave the house
--until you go back to school
--until you lose ten pounds
--until you gain ten pounds
--until you finish school
--until you get a divorce
--until you get married
--until you have kids
--until you retire
--until summer
--until spring
--until winter
--until fall
--until you die

There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So-work like you don't need money, Love like you've never been hurt, And dance like no one's watching. They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.
Take the time to live !!! 

Pictures of the past

I have had some old slides my mom had saved for quite a while. I told her I would look them over and give them back to her. Well, I had them way longer than I should have, and all the while they sat in their container while I did other things.

I finally decided to do something with them, so I fired up the scanner and gave them each a scan. I hadn't tried to scan slides before, but I'm glad I finally did. I'm a lot more encouraged to move on and do the slides of my own that have been sitting around for years waiting for me to do something with them too.

The slides my mom had dated from 1960, to about 1973 or so. It was quite a treat to see them. I had forgotten what a geek I was. Nevertheless, I scanned them all and will build a CD for each of my boys to take with them into the future. Hopefully when they have kids, they can take a few minutes to enjoy them too. 

The following picture is an example of what I discovered. I'm at the top, with my brother and sister beneath me. I would guess I'm about 12 or 13 years old or so. I shouldn't have waited so long to do this. So much water has passed under the bridge since then... and we were all cuter back then too.

I am my brother's keeper

I have taken a turn in my life that was both sudden and unexpected. I guess in the back of my mind I had a feeling that it would eventually come to pass.

As I've already stated in the past, my younger brother was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) which is complicated by frontal lobe dementia. His steady downgrading has become more apparent and I can really begin to see him losing the part that was my little brother.

He has not been able to eat normally, and subsequently has lost a lot of weight. A week ago he got an overdue addition of a feeding tube placed in him so he could take in nourishment. However, that has not gone well. He lives alone and it seems does not have what it takes to look after himself anymore.

A week ago I didn’t know anything about becoming a guardian for another person, but by mid week it was clear that this was exactly what I needed to do. Friday, I spent the majority of the day applying to be a guardian and conservator for my brother. I'm finding out that it’s a very involved process, and requires a number of court appearances to make it permanent. By order of the court, I also had to find an attorney to represent my brother. The whole process is involved and from the look of it, expensive.

For someone trying to do the right thing, and asking nothing in return, it is a stressful and thankless process. I do not know how other people do it.

Let’s see how it goes.

Update: In the end, I decided that this was not the thing to do. I withdrew all petitions placed before the court, before the first hearing date. By taking over my brother's decision making, I basically rob him of his individual civil rights. I will help him as much as I can, but I will not take his basic liberties away from him. As much as I can help it, he will retain these until the day he no longer is able. I love him too much to do anything else.

Bumper stickers for 2008

The temptation is too great, so I just have to share these.

1. Bush: End of an Error
2. That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway
3. Let's Fix Democracy in THIS Country First
4. If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran
5. Bush. Like a Rock. Only Dumber.
6. If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President
7. Of Course It Hurts: You're Getting Screwed by an Elephant!
8. Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?
9. George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight
10. Impeachment: It's Not Just for Clinton Anymore
11. America : One Nation, Under Surveillance
12. They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell It
13. Whose God Do You Kill For?
14. Jail to the Chief
15. No, Seriously, Why DID We Invade Iraq ?
16. Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap
17. Bad President! No Banana.
18. We Need a President Who's Fluent In At Least One Language
19. We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them
20. Is It Vietnam Yet?
21. Bush Doesn't Care About White People, Either
22. Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Hand basket?
23. You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.
24. When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46
25. Pray For Impeachment
26. The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century
27. What Part of "Bush Lied" Don't You Understand?
28. One Nation Under Clod
29. 2004: Embarrassed. 2005: Horrified. 2006: Terrified
30. Bush Never Exhaled
31. At Least Nixon Resigned

Asleep at the wheel

Once again, it’s been a while since I made an addition to my page. There’s no excuse really. I can account for a lot of things that have kept me busy… my son’s wedding, my racquetball games with him, the standard domestic engineering jobs around the house, editing our web site and getting it ready for a completely new pricing structure. I guess I can think of plenty more, but they don’t account for the time I wasted either. So here I am trying to rationalize why there in gaps in this. Ha!

I did cross over a very nice milestone though. On March 22, I celebrated the two year anniversary of my brain tumor surgery. The MRI I had at the beginning of the month still shows no sign of it, and this pleases me one heck of a lot. I don’t think of it much anymore, except when the time draws near for my next MRI, which has had the time lengthened between them to three months. I still get a little apprehensive as the time approaches for the next one, but as time marches on, this feeling has lessened.

I hate politics, but I find that I am being drawn into it nevertheless. The presidential election coming up, the war, the economy, and subjects surrounding health care have made me take a more firm stand on these things, and how they are driven by the politics in this country. That though is for another time, when I can be more objective.

My brother has been diagnosed with ALS and dementia, which is beginning to accelerate in its slow, but ever degenerative process. I know I’ve mentioned this in the past. Everyone in the family feels so helpless. It’s like standing on railroad tracks, with a train approaching. You are anchored in between the rails and you can do nothing to free yourself. You can hear the whistle blow, and you know it’s coming your way, but you don’t know how far down the tracks it is and how fast it’s coming, but you know that sometime in the future it will be here and run you over. All you can do is wait and watch for the inevitable end. It’s a tragic way to go, and even more painful to watch to someone you know and love, suffer through it, with no way to change the path they are on.

A quick note about fatigue

I find myself thinking and talking about my experience with my GBM less and less (and actually, I'm happy with that). However one thing is a constant reminder of my recent past. 

It's been about 8 months since my chemo ended, and although I feel pretty great most of the time, I'm still being nagged by fatigue. It continues to be a unwelcome companion, and although I do my best to counteract it. I find it still seems to be sticking with me. I looked up FATIGUE and this is a good general description.

Then I looked up POST CHEMO FATIGUE and this is a fair explanation. There is also an additional issue called CHEMO BRAIN. Although these are all reasonable descriptions for the problem, I'm not especially reassured, that for me, this will soon pass into history. I try to stay active, and at times I do particularly well. I play racquetball with my 22 year-old son twice a week, in what you might consider a very competitive activity. I do very well, but I find that I can't sustain for more than 90 minutes this like I used to. Other times, just simple tasks around our home wear me out. This is the most disturbing part. The highs and lows do not balance out. I weigh more, not less, than I should, and so far, my diet and exercise patterns have not had much of an impact. Making changes to suit my erratic energy level has made little difference.

I haven't given up by any means, but I have too many irons in the fire to be patient waiting for this fatigue to pass. Let's face it... none of us are getting any younger. (Laughing) Among other things, I still haven't learned to snowboard, and at 57, I don't think my timetable has much slack in it.

Turn signals and cell phones

I have a proposal that I think the car makers should take into consideration. We should eliminate turn signals and all of their associated electronics from our cars and trucks. 

Since the use of cell phones in cars has become epidemic, and in our zeal to get where we are going, and put common courtesy on the back burner, no one seems to use them anymore. By eliminating any trace of them from our vehicles, we will see a very nice decrease in the cost of vehicles, and we will no longer be required to remember to use them, because their function will be gone. We can just drive as we have been and leave others to guess what our intention are, just as we have been doing.

I'm sure my driving is a relatively brief part of my day, compared to many other people. Going to work and home takes a total of little more than maybe 40 minutes of each day. But in that time, I'm astounded at the continuing number of highway infractions I witness. In fact, I'm not surprised there aren't a great many more accidents than there are. Changing multiple lanes at a time are becoming common place... and have all the appearances of some sort of moving Tetris, often taking place at the last possible moment before the opportunity completely runs out. Most potential crashes I see are separated from happening by no more than about two seconds.

If the average alert and attentive driver has a reaction speed of around a half second, the margin for error leaves little time for indecision. 

I believe the idea originally behind turn signals is to show intent. That is, broadcast your intended move before you make it. However, what I routinely see is that, if used at all, they are used to indicate immediate action (with just one or two blinks). "I'm changing lanes NOW", leaving everyone else around them to scramble to avoid becoming an unwilling statistic. A great deal of the time though, they aren't used at all. People are using their phones, and can't be bothered with such trivialities. 

The other day as I was entering the freeway from work, I saw a guy driving, holding his PDA/cell phone in one hand (his driving hand), while he was holding a tablet (with the same hand), and making notes on it with the other hand. He was driving a couple MPH slower in the middle lane than the prevailing traffic, because he was already multi-tasked to the limit... and all this during evening traffic. He changed lanes twice in front of me, sort of oozing into his new lane, as opposed to changing lanes. There wasn't time for signaling or anything else, for that matter. And during my short observation of this spectacle, people were changing lanes on either side of him, and setting up a potential situation (none of them really signaling either).

I decided my best course at that moment, was to put as much space between him and I as possible, so I exited the freeway and took a more leisurely and enjoyable route home. 

Whether they are using their cars as their mobile office, or just being bubble-headed and clueless, cell phones and turn signals don't mix well. Since we are less likely to get rid of our addiction to cell phones, eliminating turn signals would be the next logical choice. I could use a cheaper car anyway, or possibly an old military 6x6. 

Most car manufacturers promote high crash ratings these days. I wonder why? 

Happy 2008

Before I get into it, Happy New Year.
I see a lot of changes coming. I hope positive ones are among the best ones I’ll remember at this year’s end.

I have to tell you, I’ve been feeling a little mortal and out of sorts lately. Don’t get me wrong, I feel fine, but the climate around me seems… well, less than optimum.

My brother is about three years younger than me. He was diagnosed with ALS and has the dementia that often accompanies it. From what I can estimate, it started becoming noticeable about a year ago, but it’s slow steady progress made it difficult to recognize, since I don’t see him that much. Now, it’s full-blown and causing a lot of anxiety in the family. What’s made it worse is that he has an 11 year-old daughter. I don’t know if she fully grasps what going on with her dad, but she has to feel a little powerless right now. We all do. His speech is so bad I can barely understand him when he talks. All we can do is watch and wait. It’s incredibly painful to see such a strong personality waste away before your eyes. Memories and experiences withering like a dying oak tree. There is so much about this that I don’t understand.

The political and geo-political situations leave me at a loss for words. I’m not very happy with either of them, but I can do little but watch and try to stay abreast of them both. Hiding your head in the sand accomplishes nothing, but that’s what I feel like doing.

The whole presidential candidate thing leaves me at a loss for words. We haven’t had “the right person for the job” in a very long time, and I can tell right now, it’s going to come down to voting against the person I really don’t want instead of for the person I do want.

The rest of the world seems to be tearing itself apart a little at a time. There seems to be so much hatred. People are not looking for solutions. They just want to promote violence for its own sake. There is no talk that will appease them or bring them to a point of discussion. They just look to the next act of violence or adversity as their pointless goal. Our answer to this is escalation and confrontation, with helpless victims caught in the crossfire. So many innocent lives lost.

The weather has cooled off considerably, and you’d think it would inspire me to get busier and do some of the things I’ve been putting off, but it seems to have had the opposite effect. I find I read more, and get quiet and introspective when the time permits, but my honey-do list seems to be suffering as a result. I scold myself for dragging my feet, but it seems to have had little impact.

My only escape from all of this is my twice-weekly game of racquetball with my youngest son, Aaron. It is the one time during the week when I feel free of the everyday bonds, and can pour myself into something that demands my full attention. We both enjoy the time immensely, and if forces me to forget about everything, if for just a short while. It’s a nice friendly game of “try to destroy the other person.” We always have a few laughs, and walk away with a feeling of accomplishment.

I’d like to fire myself up about other things, as much as I do our racquetball game. I guess I need to stop paying attention to the disagreeable things going on around me. There are a lot of good things going on. Maybe it’s time I start finding and enjoying them. Nobody likes a wet blanket.