It's been six months since my brother died, and since my granddaughter was born.
I still have trouble believing he has gone. I sometimes expect him to come up driving on his hot rod, and we would share a beer and talk about nothing. There are too many reminders of just how much his life intertwined with mine for me to so easily put away his memories.
Our little granddaughter on the other hand is such a joy to behold. She is so expressive. She appears to study everything with such intensity, and you can tell there is so much going on inside that little head, trying to make sense of a world that is so new to her. I just hope we have a world worth passing on to her.
Friday, December 18, 2009
Sunday, October 04, 2009
Tracy Golamb - 1953 to 2009
This my tribute to my brother Tracy. I've reduced the size. I hope it is enough.
If you can see this, I hope you enjoy the effort and love with which it was made.
My previous posts tell his story in words.
I hope this video in pictures and music does the same.
It's a little long, but worth the time.
Thanks for giving of your time to view it.
If you can see this, I hope you enjoy the effort and love with which it was made.
My previous posts tell his story in words.
I hope this video in pictures and music does the same.
It's a little long, but worth the time.
Thanks for giving of your time to view it.
A final act of love
I made a promise to my brother Tracy's two young girls to create a small movie for DVD in slides and music, giving tribute to him and telling his life story.
I finished this about a week ago, while on vacation, and am ready to give them a copy, along with any family member that wishes to have one. I'm proud of my first attempt to do something like this, and I think it turned out pretty well. Of course, it's not as good as it could be, if I had unlimited time and resources, but not bad. I had to watch it a couple dozen times during the making, and it brings up the same emotions of loss and love every time I did. I have to admit that I am not an especially emotional person. However, I have admit that I've cried each time I watched this.
I wish I could share this with the internet community, but even in it's QuickTime movie format, it is 162Mb and about 47 minutes long, so it is not practical to upload to a site where it can be watched. It should be.
As we all do when losing someone close, I have a couple of regrets that can never be fulfilled. The first is that I didn't give all of the support I could have in Tracy's last years. In looking back, I can see that there was much I could have added to the quality of his life. The second is that I do not have any pictures of the two of us before he died. This didn't occur to me until I put this tribute together. There are pictures of almost everyone in the family but me. I was so busy with the business of my life, that I missed out on the thing that would have made a difference for both of us. Now it is too late for us.
If you are reading this, then you know how I feel. I am telling you for your own future reference, that these regrets will fill some spot in your heart. If you act on them, then you will always feel good about your last acts of love and kindness. If you do not act on them, this place in your heart will be forever empty, and there is little you can do to mend what cannot be mended.
In my case, my only hope is that the movie I made about my brother's life will live on, and his children, and one day grandchildren, can see the kind of man he was. Even though he wasn't a great statesman, athlete, or highly recognized personality, the void he left in his passing will be felt for many years by those of us who were fortunate enough to know him.
I finished this about a week ago, while on vacation, and am ready to give them a copy, along with any family member that wishes to have one. I'm proud of my first attempt to do something like this, and I think it turned out pretty well. Of course, it's not as good as it could be, if I had unlimited time and resources, but not bad. I had to watch it a couple dozen times during the making, and it brings up the same emotions of loss and love every time I did. I have to admit that I am not an especially emotional person. However, I have admit that I've cried each time I watched this.
I wish I could share this with the internet community, but even in it's QuickTime movie format, it is 162Mb and about 47 minutes long, so it is not practical to upload to a site where it can be watched. It should be.
As we all do when losing someone close, I have a couple of regrets that can never be fulfilled. The first is that I didn't give all of the support I could have in Tracy's last years. In looking back, I can see that there was much I could have added to the quality of his life. The second is that I do not have any pictures of the two of us before he died. This didn't occur to me until I put this tribute together. There are pictures of almost everyone in the family but me. I was so busy with the business of my life, that I missed out on the thing that would have made a difference for both of us. Now it is too late for us.
If you are reading this, then you know how I feel. I am telling you for your own future reference, that these regrets will fill some spot in your heart. If you act on them, then you will always feel good about your last acts of love and kindness. If you do not act on them, this place in your heart will be forever empty, and there is little you can do to mend what cannot be mended.
In my case, my only hope is that the movie I made about my brother's life will live on, and his children, and one day grandchildren, can see the kind of man he was. Even though he wasn't a great statesman, athlete, or highly recognized personality, the void he left in his passing will be felt for many years by those of us who were fortunate enough to know him.
Thursday, October 01, 2009
Some parting thoughts about our visit to Korea
First I want to say that I had a terrific time. The weather cooperated - and was perfect, the food was great, and the time we were able to spend with family and friends was time well spent. We had a small list of things we wanted to do, and managed to do all of them with a little time to spare. I wish more vacations were as enjoyable as the one we just had.
And with that said, let me add a few afterthoughts, observances, etc.
I feel in fair shape, and don't look that bad here in the USA. I'm working to get my weight down, and my clothes are fitting better these days (the same goes for Sue, as well). When I go to Korea, I feel fat. People there (on the average) are in much better physical shape than we are. They look thinner, and eat better. Don't get me wrong, American fast food is having its effect, and you are seeing a greater number of overweight people, but it is the occasional thing, rather than the other way around. Although there are restaurants every 100 ft. or so throughout Seoul (only a slight exaggeration), you wouldn't know it to look at the people. The only truly fat people I saw there were Americans.
The guys, even though the majority of them don't spend a day in the gym, they have a healthier and happier look, even the older guys. You don't see the expanded middle that has become commonplace in the USA.
And the women? Well, the average woman over there puts ours to shame. They are slimmer, dress way better, and care more about their appearance. You don't see the spare tire on them, that seems to be so prevalent here, especially on our younger girls.
I never knew I was such a leg man before. Certainly the women in the USA have drawn my attention away from such a very sexy part of the anatomy. Sorry, no picture examples for compassionate reasons.
Their English on signs, etc. is better displayed than in some other countries, such as Japan, where interpretation of English seems to be an expressive art form. I do spot the occasional goof or misspelling, but I think if they just asked for a little more help, this would improve. One restaurant I passed regularly on my travels, posted the sign outside that said "Self Barbecue House." I'm not sure what they intended, but it leaves a little to the imagination.
What's Hot and What's Not
Western culture is alive and well in Seoul.
The things that are most commonly seen there are Dunkin Donuts, Baskin Robbins, 7-11, Bennigan's, Starbuck's, Outback Restaurant, Papa John's (which is basically all delivery), Pizza Hut (ditto), McDonald's, Burger King, and The Coffee Bean. These are everywhere, and popular.Of course they have their own Korean twist to the menu, but basically they are no different than the ones here. It is comforting to find an oasis of familiarity in a sea of kimchi.
A few things that you won't see anymore are The Seoul Hard Rock Cafe, Benihana's, and the Seoul Apple Computer store. I don't know reason for the Apple store going away. They have replace it with an authorized Apple reseller, but it just doesn't have the same feel. There were plenty of people in it though. If you want to buy apple stuff in Seoul, you'll need to do it on-line.
Vehicles you won't see on America highways
75% or so of vehicles on the streets of Seoul are Hyundae. ere is no surprise in this. There are other makers of Korean vehicles, but they are less as apparent. American and European vehicles are occasional sights, but these are driven by the financially snobbish.
There are a number of vehicles I think would be good for the USA, but sadly, although they are commonplace in the Korea, these will probably not make to American shores any time soon. These are Kia Morning, Daewoo Matiz, Daewoo Damas, Kia Bongo, and the Hyundae Porter. Interesting vehicles and used a lot over there.
I suppose there are other points I meant to highlight, but this is a good swipe at them. It is nice to be back home and in our own bed.
And with that said, let me add a few afterthoughts, observances, etc.
I feel in fair shape, and don't look that bad here in the USA. I'm working to get my weight down, and my clothes are fitting better these days (the same goes for Sue, as well). When I go to Korea, I feel fat. People there (on the average) are in much better physical shape than we are. They look thinner, and eat better. Don't get me wrong, American fast food is having its effect, and you are seeing a greater number of overweight people, but it is the occasional thing, rather than the other way around. Although there are restaurants every 100 ft. or so throughout Seoul (only a slight exaggeration), you wouldn't know it to look at the people. The only truly fat people I saw there were Americans.
The guys, even though the majority of them don't spend a day in the gym, they have a healthier and happier look, even the older guys. You don't see the expanded middle that has become commonplace in the USA.
And the women? Well, the average woman over there puts ours to shame. They are slimmer, dress way better, and care more about their appearance. You don't see the spare tire on them, that seems to be so prevalent here, especially on our younger girls.
I never knew I was such a leg man before. Certainly the women in the USA have drawn my attention away from such a very sexy part of the anatomy. Sorry, no picture examples for compassionate reasons.
Their English on signs, etc. is better displayed than in some other countries, such as Japan, where interpretation of English seems to be an expressive art form. I do spot the occasional goof or misspelling, but I think if they just asked for a little more help, this would improve. One restaurant I passed regularly on my travels, posted the sign outside that said "Self Barbecue House." I'm not sure what they intended, but it leaves a little to the imagination.
What's Hot and What's Not
Western culture is alive and well in Seoul.
The things that are most commonly seen there are Dunkin Donuts, Baskin Robbins, 7-11, Bennigan's, Starbuck's, Outback Restaurant, Papa John's (which is basically all delivery), Pizza Hut (ditto), McDonald's, Burger King, and The Coffee Bean. These are everywhere, and popular.Of course they have their own Korean twist to the menu, but basically they are no different than the ones here. It is comforting to find an oasis of familiarity in a sea of kimchi.
A few things that you won't see anymore are The Seoul Hard Rock Cafe, Benihana's, and the Seoul Apple Computer store. I don't know reason for the Apple store going away. They have replace it with an authorized Apple reseller, but it just doesn't have the same feel. There were plenty of people in it though. If you want to buy apple stuff in Seoul, you'll need to do it on-line.
Vehicles you won't see on America highways
75% or so of vehicles on the streets of Seoul are Hyundae. ere is no surprise in this. There are other makers of Korean vehicles, but they are less as apparent. American and European vehicles are occasional sights, but these are driven by the financially snobbish.
There are a number of vehicles I think would be good for the USA, but sadly, although they are commonplace in the Korea, these will probably not make to American shores any time soon. These are Kia Morning, Daewoo Matiz, Daewoo Damas, Kia Bongo, and the Hyundae Porter. Interesting vehicles and used a lot over there.
I suppose there are other points I meant to highlight, but this is a good swipe at them. It is nice to be back home and in our own bed.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Our visit to Seoul
We have been visiting Sue's family in Seoul, and have had a terrific time. We spent most of the time so far kicking back and staying close to home, and only venturing out when the reason suits us. Otherwise, It's just go slow, have some great food, and visit with the family here. Even though I have some strong things to say in the following paragraphs, I still like it here and would move back if I had the opportunity.
We have made some observations though that indicate changes in the life here, since we lived here in 2004.
• Gas over here is about $5.36 per gallon (based on 1200 won per dollar). In Arizona, we are paying about $2.50 per gallon, so the cost of fuel is about double here.
• Traffic has increased significantly here. This is the number one problem here in my mind, and like the gun issue in the USA, there will never ever be an equitable solution.
There is always a line of traffic wherever you go, and sometimes it is fairly bad. As a result, getting around here involves sitting in your car and creeping along with the rest of the crowd. This induces many people to become impatient and do things unacceptable and risky in the state of the heavy traffic and narrow streets. I've seen several times where people drove around a waiting line to turn right by entering the empty left turn lane and cutting in front of the line of cars waiting for the lane change. The tactic is common, and there are few cops to catch the overwhelming abundance of traffic violations. I have even seen city busses do this. It is basically, do what you want, because the odds of getting caught... and then pursued for it and slim to none.
From what I've seen Koreans are some of the better drivers around, but I also think they are the worst, with more emphasis on the worst. They regularly drive the way they want... (see above), and basically ignore any sort of reasonable courtesy. Like I said, the police here do not have the presence we have in the states, and with 11 million people here, it's no surprise indifference is pretty much the norm. On the other hand, I see very few accidents here. Don't ask me why. It's amazing there aren't more.
There are speed traps all over the place, and over here, there is no warning like in the states. We tell you two or three times that one is coming, and people whine and complain. They wouldn't like it here, that's for sure.
• Milk is about $5.96 per gallon (with the same won/dollar calculation). Depending on where you shop in the states, we typically pay about $1.95 a gallon for milk, making the mark-up for it, considerably higher than for gas. Maybe the cows are more costly to raise and maintain than in the states. One thing I will tell you though is that the milk here has a surprisingly better taste, making anything you use it for, taste better as well. I can't say what it is, but I like it much better than the milk at home, which doesn't have much if any of it's own flavor. I never thought I'd see milk cost more than gas.
The cost of transportation (subway, bus, taxi) has also increased slightly. We do a lot more walking here than we ever did at home. I feel about 1000% safer here on the streets than I do in the states, at any hour of the day, and the feeling seems to generally be the same with everyone you see, making the desire to just take a walk a lot more pleasurable... even for longer distances.
I had some strong things to say, but it's because I like it here very much.
America has plenty of problems that make South Korea's problems seem like a bug on a windshield, so don't get me started.
We have made some observations though that indicate changes in the life here, since we lived here in 2004.
• Gas over here is about $5.36 per gallon (based on 1200 won per dollar). In Arizona, we are paying about $2.50 per gallon, so the cost of fuel is about double here.
• Traffic has increased significantly here. This is the number one problem here in my mind, and like the gun issue in the USA, there will never ever be an equitable solution.
There is always a line of traffic wherever you go, and sometimes it is fairly bad. As a result, getting around here involves sitting in your car and creeping along with the rest of the crowd. This induces many people to become impatient and do things unacceptable and risky in the state of the heavy traffic and narrow streets. I've seen several times where people drove around a waiting line to turn right by entering the empty left turn lane and cutting in front of the line of cars waiting for the lane change. The tactic is common, and there are few cops to catch the overwhelming abundance of traffic violations. I have even seen city busses do this. It is basically, do what you want, because the odds of getting caught... and then pursued for it and slim to none.
From what I've seen Koreans are some of the better drivers around, but I also think they are the worst, with more emphasis on the worst. They regularly drive the way they want... (see above), and basically ignore any sort of reasonable courtesy. Like I said, the police here do not have the presence we have in the states, and with 11 million people here, it's no surprise indifference is pretty much the norm. On the other hand, I see very few accidents here. Don't ask me why. It's amazing there aren't more.
There are speed traps all over the place, and over here, there is no warning like in the states. We tell you two or three times that one is coming, and people whine and complain. They wouldn't like it here, that's for sure.
• Milk is about $5.96 per gallon (with the same won/dollar calculation). Depending on where you shop in the states, we typically pay about $1.95 a gallon for milk, making the mark-up for it, considerably higher than for gas. Maybe the cows are more costly to raise and maintain than in the states. One thing I will tell you though is that the milk here has a surprisingly better taste, making anything you use it for, taste better as well. I can't say what it is, but I like it much better than the milk at home, which doesn't have much if any of it's own flavor. I never thought I'd see milk cost more than gas.
The cost of transportation (subway, bus, taxi) has also increased slightly. We do a lot more walking here than we ever did at home. I feel about 1000% safer here on the streets than I do in the states, at any hour of the day, and the feeling seems to generally be the same with everyone you see, making the desire to just take a walk a lot more pleasurable... even for longer distances.
I had some strong things to say, but it's because I like it here very much.
America has plenty of problems that make South Korea's problems seem like a bug on a windshield, so don't get me started.
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Tracy's marker
My sister, Tanya and I went out on Saturday to where Tracy was placed in the Arizona Memorial Cemetery. It was a lot tougher for her than it was for me, but we spent a little while talking to him and to each other, trying to still come to grips with his loss. It is still tough to believe that he has gone. I can still hear his voice and see his easy smile. Tanya still has difficulty going into his bedroom. I know it will be a while before the pain of his loss has subsided, but I will always carry the good times between us. That is the most important thing anyway.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Who we lost in the first 6 months of 2009
It seems that we lost a great many people in the first six months of 2009. There were many notable people you have heard of, and many you have not. Below is a smattering of names of those no longer with us. I am familiar with practically every name on this list, with only a few exceptions.
As you read through the list, see how many you know. I recommend that you look up some of the ones you don't . They were all special in some way. Some of them were only known to a few, but they made this list because they made a difference to someone. Get to know them. Their names may not pass this way again.
January 2009
============
Dewey Martin, 68, Canadian-born American drummer (Buffalo Springfield).
Hélio Gracie, 95, Brazilian martial artist, creator of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
Bob May, 69, American actor (Lost in Space, The Time Tunnel), heart failure.
Sir John Mortimer, 85, British barrister, novelist and dramatist (Rumpole of the Bailey), after long illness.
Patrick McGoohan, 80, American-born Irish actor (The Prisoner, Braveheart), after short illness.
Rob Gauntlett, 21, British mountaineer, youngest Briton to climb Mount Everest, climbing accident.
February 2009
=============
Paul Harvey, 90, American radio broadcaster.
Philip José Farmer, 91, American writer (Riverworld).
Brad Van Pelt, 57, American football player (New York Giants), heart attack.
James Whitmore, 87, American Academy Award–nominated actor, lung cancer.
March 2009
===========
Dan Seals, 61, American country music singer-songwriter (England Dan & John Ford Coley), mantle cell lymphoma.
Lloyd Ruby, 81, American auto racing driver.
Natasha Richardson, 45, British actress, epidural hematoma.
Ron Silver, 62, American actor and political activist, esophageal cancer.
Jimmy Boyd, 70, American actor and singer ("I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"), cancer.
April 2009
=========
Hans Holzer, 89, Austrian-born American paranormal investigator and author, after long illness.
Beatrice Arthur, 86, American Emmy and Tony Award-winning actress (Maude, The Golden Girls, Mame), cancer.
Marilyn Chambers, 56, American pornographic film actress (Behind the Green Door), erotic dancer, and politician, heart disease.
Russell E. Dunham, 89, American war veteran, Medal of Honor recipient, heart failure.
May 2009
=========
Millvina Dean, 97, British woman, last living passenger aboard the Titanic, pneumonia.
Roh Moo-hyun, 62, South Korean politician, President (2003–2008), suicide by jumping.
Adolf Dickfeld, 99, German World War II Luftwaffe flying ace.
Wayman Tisdale, 44, American basketball player and jazz bassist, cancer.
Dom DeLuise, 75, American actor (The Cannonball Run, The Secret of NIMH), writer, chef and cookbook author, kidney failure.
June 2009
=========
Billy Mays, 50, American pitchman and television host (Pitchmen), hypertensive heart disease.
Gale Storm, 87, American actress (My Little Margie, The Gale Storm Show).
Farrah Fawcett, 62, American actress (Charlie's Angels), anal cancer.
Michael Jackson, 50, American pop singer–songwriter, cardiac arrest.
Ed McMahon, 86, American television host (Star Search) and announcer (The Tonight Show).
Bob Bogle, 75, American guitarist (The Ventures), non-Hodgkin lymphoma.
Roger Terry, 87, American airman (Tuskegee Airmen), heart failure.
David Carradine, 72, American actor (Kung Fu, Kill Bill), hanging.
Shih Kien, 96, Hong Kong actor (Enter the Dragon).
Bob Christie, 85, American racing driver.
Tracy Golamb, 55, Diesel mechanic, father, brother, hot rod builder, complications of ALS.
As you read through the list, see how many you know. I recommend that you look up some of the ones you don't . They were all special in some way. Some of them were only known to a few, but they made this list because they made a difference to someone. Get to know them. Their names may not pass this way again.
January 2009
============
Dewey Martin, 68, Canadian-born American drummer (Buffalo Springfield).
Hélio Gracie, 95, Brazilian martial artist, creator of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
Bob May, 69, American actor (Lost in Space, The Time Tunnel), heart failure.
Sir John Mortimer, 85, British barrister, novelist and dramatist (Rumpole of the Bailey), after long illness.
Patrick McGoohan, 80, American-born Irish actor (The Prisoner, Braveheart), after short illness.
Rob Gauntlett, 21, British mountaineer, youngest Briton to climb Mount Everest, climbing accident.
February 2009
=============
Paul Harvey, 90, American radio broadcaster.
Philip José Farmer, 91, American writer (Riverworld).
Brad Van Pelt, 57, American football player (New York Giants), heart attack.
James Whitmore, 87, American Academy Award–nominated actor, lung cancer.
March 2009
===========
Dan Seals, 61, American country music singer-songwriter (England Dan & John Ford Coley), mantle cell lymphoma.
Lloyd Ruby, 81, American auto racing driver.
Natasha Richardson, 45, British actress, epidural hematoma.
Ron Silver, 62, American actor and political activist, esophageal cancer.
Jimmy Boyd, 70, American actor and singer ("I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"), cancer.
April 2009
=========
Hans Holzer, 89, Austrian-born American paranormal investigator and author, after long illness.
Beatrice Arthur, 86, American Emmy and Tony Award-winning actress (Maude, The Golden Girls, Mame), cancer.
Marilyn Chambers, 56, American pornographic film actress (Behind the Green Door), erotic dancer, and politician, heart disease.
Russell E. Dunham, 89, American war veteran, Medal of Honor recipient, heart failure.
May 2009
=========
Millvina Dean, 97, British woman, last living passenger aboard the Titanic, pneumonia.
Roh Moo-hyun, 62, South Korean politician, President (2003–2008), suicide by jumping.
Adolf Dickfeld, 99, German World War II Luftwaffe flying ace.
Wayman Tisdale, 44, American basketball player and jazz bassist, cancer.
Dom DeLuise, 75, American actor (The Cannonball Run, The Secret of NIMH), writer, chef and cookbook author, kidney failure.
June 2009
=========
Billy Mays, 50, American pitchman and television host (Pitchmen), hypertensive heart disease.
Gale Storm, 87, American actress (My Little Margie, The Gale Storm Show).
Farrah Fawcett, 62, American actress (Charlie's Angels), anal cancer.
Michael Jackson, 50, American pop singer–songwriter, cardiac arrest.
Ed McMahon, 86, American television host (Star Search) and announcer (The Tonight Show).
Bob Bogle, 75, American guitarist (The Ventures), non-Hodgkin lymphoma.
Roger Terry, 87, American airman (Tuskegee Airmen), heart failure.
David Carradine, 72, American actor (Kung Fu, Kill Bill), hanging.
Shih Kien, 96, Hong Kong actor (Enter the Dragon).
Bob Christie, 85, American racing driver.
Tracy Golamb, 55, Diesel mechanic, father, brother, hot rod builder, complications of ALS.
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
If these walls could talk...
As you already know, I am a big admirer of the life and culture of Korea. There are so many things to envy about the country and its people. Living there gave me a real appreciation, especially since my extended family there has taken the time to show me how exceptional it can be.
Anyway, I was reading the on-line news and I ran across this article about some of Seoul's history. I found it fascinating. It's part of a series, so explore a little if it spurs more interest. Hearing about Seoul's history from my wife Sue has inspired me to delve a little deeper on my own. Check it out. I hope you enjoy it. If these walls could talk...
Anyway, I was reading the on-line news and I ran across this article about some of Seoul's history. I found it fascinating. It's part of a series, so explore a little if it spurs more interest. Hearing about Seoul's history from my wife Sue has inspired me to delve a little deeper on my own. Check it out. I hope you enjoy it. If these walls could talk...
Thursday, June 25, 2009
What's ado with North Korea
Have you been keeping up with the news about North Korea these days? I find it very interesting.
Tens of Thousands of N. Koreans Rally in Defiance of US
Tens of Thousands of N. Koreans Rally in Defiance of US
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Our new grand child and us
Well our granddaughter is about two and a half weeks old now. This picture was taken tonight when the kids came over. My son dropped by to assist me while I worked on my brother's hot rod. I got some help from a local restoration garage putting it back together, and they did a crap job of it. Now before it is actually road worthy, I need to fix their screw ups.
Anyway, my son showed up, and when I peeked around from the garage, I saw he had his wife with him, so I knew they had also brought the baby. I called in to Sue, "Hey, they brought the baby." I was so funny. I never saw her move so fast. She dashed out the door and met them before they had hardly gotten up the driveway. Well the girls went in the house, and Aaron stayed out with me and helped me work on the car.
While we worked on the car, Aaron's wife came out, so I asked her how she was doing. She said she had lost a lot of her pregnancy weight, and she was feeling pretty much back to normal. She looks great, and happy, and hardly like she just had a baby. Of course, Aaron is all smiles. He still can't believe he's a dad, but I can tell he's a proud one.
I think Sue must have held our granddaughter most of the time she was here. I did get to hold her later on, so I made sure Aaron got our picture. So here are the proud grandparents. Can you tell?
Anyway, my son showed up, and when I peeked around from the garage, I saw he had his wife with him, so I knew they had also brought the baby. I called in to Sue, "Hey, they brought the baby." I was so funny. I never saw her move so fast. She dashed out the door and met them before they had hardly gotten up the driveway. Well the girls went in the house, and Aaron stayed out with me and helped me work on the car.
While we worked on the car, Aaron's wife came out, so I asked her how she was doing. She said she had lost a lot of her pregnancy weight, and she was feeling pretty much back to normal. She looks great, and happy, and hardly like she just had a baby. Of course, Aaron is all smiles. He still can't believe he's a dad, but I can tell he's a proud one.
I think Sue must have held our granddaughter most of the time she was here. I did get to hold her later on, so I made sure Aaron got our picture. So here are the proud grandparents. Can you tell?
Thursday, June 18, 2009
How do you measure up?
Maybe I'm just getting to be a grumpy old guy, or maybe I've just lived long enough to finally observe life and come to some conclusions. I don't know which it is... maybe a little of both.
I've watched people from many walks of life, both in the USA and in different countries, so I think I have a fairly good base from which to pass on my opinion. It isn't necessarily right, but I don't think it's far from wrong.
I looked up the word - narcissism, and here's what I read.
==================
Narcissism - with an origin from about 1815 to 1825.
1. Excessive love or admiration of oneself. See Synonyms at conceit.
2. A psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem.
Synonyms for narcissism: self-centeredness, smugness, egocentrism.
So I looked up - conceit.
Conceit - with an origin from about 1350 to 1400. Obviously, we've been aware of this for quite a while.
1. an excessively favorable opinion of one's own ability, importance, wit, etc.
Synonyms: self-esteem, vanity, egotism, complacency.
==================
I basically already knew all of this, but I've been thinking that these definitions need to have a 21st century update. You see it all the time, with the way people act. Courtesy and basic thoughtfulness seem to have become passe, and on any given day you can see a dozen examples of self-importance.
• Driving on the freeway, while talking or even texting on their phone or PDA. Isn't driving job 1, for everybody's safety?
• A meeting ends, so they come out of the meeting room and continue the meeting in the hallway, essentially blocking the path for people to get through.
• Shopping in the grocery store, and another person shopping has parked their cart dead center in the aisle.
• Someone driving down the road flips the butt of their cigarette out the window, instead of putting it in the trash.
• A group of people are walking down a pathway. They are walking abreast of each other, taking up 90% of the hallway. As you approach from the opposite direction, they act as if it's an inconvenience to step aside and let you pass.
• Working out at the gym, and someone has finished using a piece of equipment, just sits at it, keeping anyone else for using it. Or leaving a piece of equipment, without unloading the weights they put on to work out.
• Sitting a restaurant, and someone at the next table gets a call on their cell phone. They sit there and let it ring and ring before they answer it, and then once they do, they talk loud enough for everyone within four tables to hear everything they say.
• Smokers who take no effort to avoid non-smokers, while taking their cigarette break.
The list goes on and on, but I think you get the idea. All of these actions show a thorough lack of consideration for anyone else. They perpetually place their own need or importance first, and forsake anyone or anything that might interrupt their current activity, and take offense at their selfishness being brought to their attention.
Don't get me wrong, there are people that are not that way, and you can easily identify them. They act in such a way as to be in total contrast to the people above. It's so refreshing to see people act this way, that I can't help but smile when I do. Maybe I should start telling them thank you.
I've lived in Seoul, Korea for while, which has eleven million people, and in my time there, I saw few situations where the same kind of egocentric behavior was evident. They are a much more respectful people as a whole. I encountered more reverence from total strangers than from people I associate with now, let alone strangers.
I would just like people to think before they act. We all have to work together in this world, if we want to make it last. Is taking a few extra seconds to consider how you appear to other people too much to ask? Some days I think this is probably so. There would be a lot less animosity and stress if we did.
Even George Bush has taken the country's narcissism to the highest level. When discussing the problems and actions we should take to combat global warming, he said that some steps were not on the table, because they would be bad for the U.S. economy. Well I guess we had better get used to a changed world. This problem and a host of others will never be truly addressed if we continue to think like that... How do you measure up?
Rant over. :o)
I've watched people from many walks of life, both in the USA and in different countries, so I think I have a fairly good base from which to pass on my opinion. It isn't necessarily right, but I don't think it's far from wrong.
I looked up the word - narcissism, and here's what I read.
==================
Narcissism - with an origin from about 1815 to 1825.
1. Excessive love or admiration of oneself. See Synonyms at conceit.
2. A psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem.
Synonyms for narcissism: self-centeredness, smugness, egocentrism.
So I looked up - conceit.
Conceit - with an origin from about 1350 to 1400. Obviously, we've been aware of this for quite a while.
1. an excessively favorable opinion of one's own ability, importance, wit, etc.
Synonyms: self-esteem, vanity, egotism, complacency.
==================
I basically already knew all of this, but I've been thinking that these definitions need to have a 21st century update. You see it all the time, with the way people act. Courtesy and basic thoughtfulness seem to have become passe, and on any given day you can see a dozen examples of self-importance.
• Driving on the freeway, while talking or even texting on their phone or PDA. Isn't driving job 1, for everybody's safety?
• A meeting ends, so they come out of the meeting room and continue the meeting in the hallway, essentially blocking the path for people to get through.
• Shopping in the grocery store, and another person shopping has parked their cart dead center in the aisle.
• Someone driving down the road flips the butt of their cigarette out the window, instead of putting it in the trash.
• A group of people are walking down a pathway. They are walking abreast of each other, taking up 90% of the hallway. As you approach from the opposite direction, they act as if it's an inconvenience to step aside and let you pass.
• Working out at the gym, and someone has finished using a piece of equipment, just sits at it, keeping anyone else for using it. Or leaving a piece of equipment, without unloading the weights they put on to work out.
• Sitting a restaurant, and someone at the next table gets a call on their cell phone. They sit there and let it ring and ring before they answer it, and then once they do, they talk loud enough for everyone within four tables to hear everything they say.
• Smokers who take no effort to avoid non-smokers, while taking their cigarette break.
The list goes on and on, but I think you get the idea. All of these actions show a thorough lack of consideration for anyone else. They perpetually place their own need or importance first, and forsake anyone or anything that might interrupt their current activity, and take offense at their selfishness being brought to their attention.
Don't get me wrong, there are people that are not that way, and you can easily identify them. They act in such a way as to be in total contrast to the people above. It's so refreshing to see people act this way, that I can't help but smile when I do. Maybe I should start telling them thank you.
I've lived in Seoul, Korea for while, which has eleven million people, and in my time there, I saw few situations where the same kind of egocentric behavior was evident. They are a much more respectful people as a whole. I encountered more reverence from total strangers than from people I associate with now, let alone strangers.
I would just like people to think before they act. We all have to work together in this world, if we want to make it last. Is taking a few extra seconds to consider how you appear to other people too much to ask? Some days I think this is probably so. There would be a lot less animosity and stress if we did.
Even George Bush has taken the country's narcissism to the highest level. When discussing the problems and actions we should take to combat global warming, he said that some steps were not on the table, because they would be bad for the U.S. economy. Well I guess we had better get used to a changed world. This problem and a host of others will never be truly addressed if we continue to think like that... How do you measure up?
Rant over. :o)
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Lingering emotions
I am working past the loss of my brother Tracy, but there is a lot that I will never push past, just as there is from the death of my dad, nearly 15 years ago. I mostly regret the things that they will miss seeing... their kids and grandkids growing up and their accomplishments, and the pride that they would have felt inside knowing that they were responsible for getting is all started.
I found a quote that seems to typify my feelings, and will probably use it more than once... because it fits.
"You'll get over it...' It's the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life forever. You don't get over it because 'it' is the person you loved. The pain stops, and there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not erased by anyone but death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no one else can fit. Why would I want them to?” - Eskimo Proverb
I found a quote that seems to typify my feelings, and will probably use it more than once... because it fits.
"You'll get over it...' It's the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life forever. You don't get over it because 'it' is the person you loved. The pain stops, and there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not erased by anyone but death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no one else can fit. Why would I want them to?” - Eskimo Proverb
Friday, June 12, 2009
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Farewell my friend
I have some very sad news.
My brother died today from complications of his ALS.
It was beautiful as long as it lasted, but time was too short.
I will miss him severely.
This poem is for you, Tracy.
Safe journey...
=========================
Farewell My Friend
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
~ Rabindranath Tagore
My brother died today from complications of his ALS.
It was beautiful as long as it lasted, but time was too short.
I will miss him severely.
This poem is for you, Tracy.
Safe journey...
=========================
Farewell My Friend
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
~ Rabindranath Tagore
Saturday, June 06, 2009
A snapshot in time
Someone made a comment that they wished I would update my blog more often. They are right, I should. I enjoy writing, and it gives me a little smile when I think I've done an OK job at my latest piece. I'm pleased to hear someone takes the time to read my ramblings. I'm sure they will out live me, and may someday offer a snapshot in time in the life of just another soul on this planet.
So much has happened, it just goes to show that I need to keep up better.
My brother, Tracy is doing about as well as someone can in his situation. My sister and her husband are taking excellent are of Tracy. Even the nurses who make scheduled stops to check in on them, have great things to say about Tanya's attention to our brother. She is very protective of him, and it shows. After some family flap, my syster and I have finally and fully completed taking over Tracy's care and management. It has allowed us to get all of the right people talking to each other and working together. He hasn't had a health incident, like pneumonia, in a month. This will help him recover from past problems and gain some strength. He seems a lot happier these days.
And now for the really big news... I am a grandpa for the first time.
Our first grand child was born yesterday, and I couldn't be more pleased. She is an amazing 5lb. 6oz. little dream come true. I never thought such a tiny thing could bring a 200lb. grumpy guy like myself to tears, just by holding her as she sleeps. Look at this child and tell me you could refuse getting her that new Ford Mustang. I have a feeling she is going to be my Achilles' Heel.
More to come, but right now, I have to go back to the hospital and hold her just a little longer today.
So much has happened, it just goes to show that I need to keep up better.
My brother, Tracy is doing about as well as someone can in his situation. My sister and her husband are taking excellent are of Tracy. Even the nurses who make scheduled stops to check in on them, have great things to say about Tanya's attention to our brother. She is very protective of him, and it shows. After some family flap, my syster and I have finally and fully completed taking over Tracy's care and management. It has allowed us to get all of the right people talking to each other and working together. He hasn't had a health incident, like pneumonia, in a month. This will help him recover from past problems and gain some strength. He seems a lot happier these days.
And now for the really big news... I am a grandpa for the first time.
Our first grand child was born yesterday, and I couldn't be more pleased. She is an amazing 5lb. 6oz. little dream come true. I never thought such a tiny thing could bring a 200lb. grumpy guy like myself to tears, just by holding her as she sleeps. Look at this child and tell me you could refuse getting her that new Ford Mustang. I have a feeling she is going to be my Achilles' Heel.
More to come, but right now, I have to go back to the hospital and hold her just a little longer today.
Friday, May 01, 2009
My brother Tracy
Today my heart has never been heavier. My brother, Tracy, was admitted to the hospital once again, for having trouble breathing. His ALS is taking a heavy toll on his body, and I have to wonder how much more he can endure of the trauma assaulting his body. While awake and alert, he is in fairly good spirits. However, those times seem to be farther and farther apart.
We are not close at all anymore... at least not like we used to be. Our differences and changes in attitude have distanced us Nevertheless, he is my only brother and it hurts to watch him in this state of ill health, knowing that every day that passes brings him closer to oblivion.
There was a time a few years ago, when I was stricken with my brain tumor, that I though he would outlive all of us. Now it looks as though he will be the first of us to go. Everyone that has supplied help for him... including, Hospice, the Paralyzed Veterans of America, Social Workers, and so many doctors and nurses have been so understanding and good to him.
My sister Tanya and her husband, Steve, have put their own lives on hold to look after him. They watch after him 24/7 and have asked for nothing for themselves, even though my sister is on disability herself, and Steve was laid off from his job and is currently drawing unemployment. They have done a fantastic job.
All we can do at the moment is watch and wait. I hope Tracy's girls can have the time to spend with him and take away something positive from all of this. Time will tell. I will keep you posted.
We are not close at all anymore... at least not like we used to be. Our differences and changes in attitude have distanced us Nevertheless, he is my only brother and it hurts to watch him in this state of ill health, knowing that every day that passes brings him closer to oblivion.
There was a time a few years ago, when I was stricken with my brain tumor, that I though he would outlive all of us. Now it looks as though he will be the first of us to go. Everyone that has supplied help for him... including, Hospice, the Paralyzed Veterans of America, Social Workers, and so many doctors and nurses have been so understanding and good to him.
My sister Tanya and her husband, Steve, have put their own lives on hold to look after him. They watch after him 24/7 and have asked for nothing for themselves, even though my sister is on disability herself, and Steve was laid off from his job and is currently drawing unemployment. They have done a fantastic job.
All we can do at the moment is watch and wait. I hope Tracy's girls can have the time to spend with him and take away something positive from all of this. Time will tell. I will keep you posted.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Recent news as of March 2009
I haven't written much lately. No excuses really. I've had other things going on, and frankly there isn't much worthy to pass on.
My last MRI was as good as it can get. Nothing more needs to be said about this.
I've been working, seeing my personal trainer multiple times during the week, and trying to use my spare time that's left relaxing. Unfortunately, this doesn't include blogging.
One thing I did start doing again was reading. I was a constant reader for many years, but for some reason I got out of the habit. I read a lot of Robert Fulghum, but as a diversion from my usual stuff, I picked up a book called Jesus Interrupted by Bart Ehrman. I find it fascinating. I am not a religious person and don't discuss religion, but this book validates all of the things I have believed. It's really worth the time for an open-minded person to explore.
I'm still struggling to get my weight to decline, but I am seeing some strides in this area. Age and my love of chocolate chip cookies has posed a bit of a road hazard, but I'm finding ways to still make progress. Glaciers melt faster, but it is happening.
Sue and I are getting back on track and making improvements to the house. We have a laundry list of stuff, but as long as we spend our budget wisely, I think we can make most of it happen this year. We shall see how it goes.
My last MRI was as good as it can get. Nothing more needs to be said about this.
I've been working, seeing my personal trainer multiple times during the week, and trying to use my spare time that's left relaxing. Unfortunately, this doesn't include blogging.
One thing I did start doing again was reading. I was a constant reader for many years, but for some reason I got out of the habit. I read a lot of Robert Fulghum, but as a diversion from my usual stuff, I picked up a book called Jesus Interrupted by Bart Ehrman. I find it fascinating. I am not a religious person and don't discuss religion, but this book validates all of the things I have believed. It's really worth the time for an open-minded person to explore.
I'm still struggling to get my weight to decline, but I am seeing some strides in this area. Age and my love of chocolate chip cookies has posed a bit of a road hazard, but I'm finding ways to still make progress. Glaciers melt faster, but it is happening.
Sue and I are getting back on track and making improvements to the house. We have a laundry list of stuff, but as long as we spend our budget wisely, I think we can make most of it happen this year. We shall see how it goes.
Monday, January 05, 2009
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