A final act of love

I made a promise to my brother Tracy's two young girls to create a small movie for DVD in slides and music, giving tribute to him and telling his life story.

I finished this about a week ago, while on vacation, and am ready to give them a copy, along with any family member that wishes to have one. I'm proud of my first attempt to do something like this, and I think it turned out pretty well. Of course, it's not as good as it could be, if I had unlimited time and resources, but not bad. I had to watch it a couple dozen times during the making, and it brings up the same emotions of loss and love every time I did. I have to admit that I am not an especially emotional person. However, I have admit that I've cried each time I watched this.

I wish I could share this with the internet community, but even in it's QuickTime movie format, it is 162Mb and about 47 minutes long, so it is not practical to upload to a site where it can be watched. It should be.

As we all do when losing someone close, I have a couple of regrets that can never be fulfilled. The first is that I didn't give all of the support I could have in Tracy's last years. In looking back, I can see that there was much I could have added to the quality of his life. The second is that I do not have any pictures of the two of us before he died. This didn't occur to me until I put this tribute together. There are pictures of almost everyone in the family but me. I was so busy with the business of my life, that I missed out on the thing that would have made a difference for both of us. Now it is too late for us.

If you are reading this, then you know how I feel. I am telling you for your own future reference, that these regrets will fill some spot in your heart. If you act on them, then you will always feel good about your last acts of love and kindness. If you do not act on them, this place in your heart will be forever empty, and there is little you can do to mend what cannot be mended.

In my case, my only hope is that the movie I made about my brother's life will live on, and his children, and one day grandchildren, can see the kind of man he was. Even though he wasn't a great statesman, athlete, or highly recognized personality, the void he left in his passing will be felt for many years by those of us who were fortunate enough to know him.