A time for change

Yesterday was an anniversary of sorts. One year ago, on March 22, I was rushed into surgery to remove the Grade IV GBM, residing in the back of my brain. It hardly seems like it was a year ago. So much has happened since then. Aside from the follow-up treatments, which have sucked a fair portion of my energy away for the past year, I feel great. I haven’t returned to my former self, but I’ve changed in mind and body since then, so I don’t know that my inner self wants to be the person that I was.

I’m working out again regularly and I like that a lot. I’m surprised that I’m as strong as I am, and can do pretty much what I want to. My only problem now is, where do I want to go from here? The simple fact that I’m older and (let’s face it) slower than I used to be has me reevaluating what my new interests should be. I gave up Shinkendo because I didn’t know how soon I might come back to it. Now that I’m at that crossroads, I don’t have the interest in retraining to regain my former expertise. I’ll be, for the most part, competing with kids 1/3 to ½ my age. And although I don’t feel like that might stop me, I will never come back up to the level that will make me a valued contributor. The sport has not sat idle while I have been out, so I have a lot of new material to learn, while honing the old stuff. That a pretty steep climb to make just to satisfy some sort of undefined inner goal.

Besides, I have so many other things I’ve yet to try, I feel like it’s time for me to take pride in what I accomplished and find a new challenge. There are plenty of unexplored opportunities still waiting, so I’d better get busy.

I finished building Sue’s greenhouse, and she already has plenty of plants poking up through the ground. I hope all the tomatoes, squash, peppers, spinach, strawberries, and herbs turn out as well as they are starting. I’m anxious to award her with a farmer’s merit badge. She seems so excited about her efforts so far. We have flowers growing everywhere as well.

This year (although it's having a rocky start) seems to be in substantial contrast to the one we just had. I hope it continues to brighten up and improve as it continues through spring. The Year of the Pig could be a good one for us.